so I’m going to the dermatologist on the 17th! I’ve actually had to reschedule two times now because of inconveniences but I’m definitely going this next time! The good news is that I’m seriously aiming to get laser treatment for my skin/complexion. Ever since puberty started I’ve struggled a lot with my complexion. Granted it is definitely not the worst it’s just I’ve had specific skin problems that I personally have found troubling. In my specific case my skin care has been very unique and challenging. Being adopted by an all white family has come with direct skin issues. For example, because I’m brown I face the challenges of hyper pigmentation which none of my family deals with. I also personally have some large pores and I’ve had to deal with cystic acne (especially in middle school) which none of my family has had to deal with either. To be frank, I have some scars and enlarged pores because of skin issues and failure to know how to properly care for my specific skin type. I have talked to my mom and I seriously think she is starting to understand. Now a further complication that may sound shallow (because it is, I can’t argue that) is the fact that I’m gay. Gay culture is typically rather vain and very critical—The life I want to live, the people that I have grown up associating with and have been raised around is just at a higher standard then the general population. Now I should note that i don’t really associate with gay culture but I’m still gay and that ties into my own standard of myself. I know the resource is available so I’d like to take advantage of it especially because I have the means to do so. This is not to say that I do not recognize the underlying issues. I know I’m insecure but most people are. It’s just I’d rather deal with the deeper insecurities than adjusting them further to my literally surface levels ones of not having the best skin. It true that with age the sebaceous glands “mature” and begin to act differently but the issues I have can not be fixed with time. Scars need to be dealt with or accepted and I’ve struggled with them for a while. I hope this proves to be a good path.